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Online Dating: Bring A Friend?
When dating online, many people tend to feel that they are in the process alone, perhaps because sitting at a computer is more often than not a solitary function, perhaps because they still feel that certain perceptions of online dating demand that they do not share the process with even their closest friends. While certain conversations held online might be very private indeed, a great deal of the process can be shared with a close friend and person that you trust. Why would you want to enlist the expertise of your buddy? Simply because, just like in the non pixel world of dating sometimes it is helpful to have a friend by your side.
Testing the Waters Together: If you and a good friend both have an interest in dating online going through the process together can make it a little easier and sometimes more exciting. The ability to share your experience when setting up a profile and navigating a new community with a person you trust can make everything a little bit less intimidating and often more exciting.
An Honest Description: Reviewing your friend's profile and allowing them to review your own, can be an excellent way to get around both insecurity and embellishment as your friend knows you well enough to write about the true you; some find it very helpful to have a friend actually write their profiles for them as this will likely be an honest reflection of how others will perceive you.
A Question of Taste: For many people, especially those who have themselves struggling with relationships, it is likely that your close friend has a good idea about what kind of person you would enjoy getting to know. If you trust and value your friend's opinion asking them about what kind of person they believe would suit you best can be an excellent way to narrow down a selection of candidates. Often people become blinding by qualities which will not necessarily make for a happy relationship; in these cases having a friend to rely on for ideas can be a great way to avoid old pitfalls.
A Second Opinion: Again, certain conversations you may want to keep to yourself, however showing some of your correspondence with a new romantic interest with your friend, is often good for an honest look at how that person is coming across. Having an outside point of view that you trust can at times reveal details that you missed. Allowing a person who you know has your best interests at heart to size up this new relationship can allow you to feel more comfortable proceeding in the relationship and it can be fun to share the romantic or sexy details with someone you trust.
Warning Lights: When enlisting the help of a friend you gain the perspective of a person who is objective and less inclined to feel emotionally attached to the person whom you have developed an interest in. This outside point of view can be very valuable in detecting those people who more than likely would end up being a poor match for you. While you can't leave every detail up to your friend, sometimes you simply have to follow what you feel; knowing that you have a person to keep watch for anything suspicious can be a great comfort.
A Gentle Push: Many people have great difficulty in expressing their thoughts and feelings, especially with strangers, in this situation being able to discuss certain issues with a friend before you bring them up online can help to better prepare you for the conversation. Taking the time to reflect upon the opinions your friend shares with you about certain topics can help a great deal in eliminating some of the insecurity and frustration many people feel when asked about their lives.
Making it Real: Often people tend to feel that even a well developed online relationship is far away or unreal in some way; before you take the step of meeting a person in real life, involving a friend, even in a small way, in your budding relationship can help to make it a more real part of your life. If you choose to take your relationship to a more real feeling level by talking on the phone or using a webcam; a friend's participation in this step can also be of great help. Allowing your romantic interest to meet your friend through either of these communication devices can help both of you to feel that the relationship is progressing to a more real and familiar place.
A Friend's Blessing: Though it may not be essential to a good relationship, having your friend's approval and encouragement can make the experience a better one. When a person you trust gives their blessing about another person who is new to your life it is common to feel more positive about the situation and more hopeful. Including your friend in your new found happiness is a wonderful way to bring another person, who may someday be just as important, into your life.
Whether it's keeping you honest, forcing you to express yourself, advising a little caution or encouraging you toward a happy relationship; having a buddy by your side to help you through the online dating process can be a wonderful way to keep you strong, cautious and optimistic.